This weekend we are in Brooklyn, NY for a birthday celebration for my younger daughter with the family and friends who live here. We visit once a season or so, enjoying what residents love about living here, including awesome and inexpensive cuisine from around the world through simply a subway ride. Last night we chose dinner in Tibet courtesy of a restaurant the size of a large walk-in closet and sipping Tibetan hot buttered tea, I studied the autographed pictures of the Dalai Lama near our table.

Noticing my interest, the owner of the restaurant showed me another picture near the register and he proudly pointed out the words the Dalai Lama had written across the photo...."Don't give up your dream". He told me how he had spoken with the Dalai Lama at a recent meeting of Tibetan exiles living in New York City and how his despair at being exiled from his beloved home and culture had transformed into renewed tending his dream for peace instead.

Dreams are critical for our life human and without our dreams, humanity would not unfold. Our imagination plants the seeds of dreams and we tend to our dreams with our thoughts and the actions we engage on behalf of them. Dreams have their time and their way and need the courage of our heart and our deepest faith in both humans and life. When we despair of a dream ever becoming, embracing patience and commitment serves the dream while the "proof" that our eyes and minds demand does not.

So honor the dreams that come through you, trusting as you tend to them with faith, they will grow, and that they come to you in faith of your tending as well. The Dalai Lama had simply reminded this man exiled from all he had known that his dream to return through peace was impossible only when he give up on it. For while a dream's time to be is not be in our control, keeping up with our faith in our dreams is....

Choosing to Be Queen

As women, our roles often involve supporting and accomplishing things for others can leave us with an unease about whether our own life is being supported and accomplished as well. Symptoms that we are not doing so well in honoring our own life show up as feeling overwhelmed, a lack of time and energy to engage in what has meaning and value for ourselves, and crankiness towards those we are supporting and accomplishing for. In short, we have forgotten we are Queen; yes, with the tasks it takes to rule our kingdom..and, not as much through doing for others as through envisioning, empowering, and leading the way.

One of the challenges we will face at mid-life is deciding whether we want to honor being Queen of our life, or not. To be Queen means acknowledging that as women, we are the organizing energy around which relationship, family, and community constellate. When we choose to leave being a princess (daughter) to step into being Queen (a woman sovereign), we choose no longer expecting others to tell us what to do, what is important, and where to spend our precious time and energy. We decide for ourselves using the infinite vision and resources of our hearts and souls, as well as our present minds and conditions. To decide for ourselves means we let go of blaming others for the states of our affairs and instead, with courage and clarity, take up sorting through our life and choices as we do closets, determining what still has value and what now needs to be let go in gratitude for how it has served.

To honor (and act) on what is true for ourselves requires the vision of a Queen-broad and long, the vision of seven generations many traditional cultures remind us is necessary for making decisions that serve all well. No longer can we place our heart and soul's wisdom and guidance separate from what crafts our choices for our daily lives and the lives we guide and support as women. The sacred is meant to be part of our everyday life and the Queen-the visionaries and leaders in kingdoms intimate and common-illuminates and enjoys living this. Through her grace innate, her grit the inspiration of legends, and her gratitude active each day, a Queen uplifts and inspires those she serves with in the sacred temple of everyday life.