integrity matters

One of the things I have learned about my life is 1. answers do come to the questions I ask of the universe and 2. sometimes I need to do something physical to get out of my head in order to hear-feel really-my answer. And so, on this fine May day, I took myself, my ipod with mp3s that I have been meaning to listen to-omg is that one truly from 2007?!-to rake up oak leaves buried in the grass over winter. Good focused physical exercise that would allow me to engage my conscious mind so that other minds could speak to me.

The question awaiting an answer was how to craft a business that delivers my passion for women's impact -our grace, grit, and gratitude-while being a woman, a mother, a friend, and a daughter, an artist.... As my peeps know, I am all about the "how" in deciphering the world, for in the "how" is the integrity, something our world is learning the need for these days. I first learned the importance of integrity-the congruence between the "what "and the "how"-while volunteering for a series of non-profits in my early 20's. It was in these years of working with people committed to bettering the world and yet, so often angry at those perceived as not caring the same, that I learned of the importance of integrity in my life... ....that going to war for peace does not create peace.

I learned integrity's wisdom while learning to parent, for while children may not come with a written instruction manual, they do come with their own directions. And when we are willing to acknowledge the difference between their needs and our history, make our parenting choices accordingly, we honor the sacred trust of being the child's first god/dess and teacher, growing up both the child and the parent in the process. Another wisdom learned through integrity....life is mutual, set up to teach and benefit all involved.

Raking and listening to my ipod, I heard Howard Schultz, the founder of Starbucks, talk of the four principles that guide him, number 4 being "everything matters" or as I say, the small builds the big. As women, we know this well...the many small acts needed to grow a human being from a baby into maturity, the many small acts that transform a building into a cozy home, or the many small acts over time which actualize our faith and trust in each other. Another JaiKaur life truism...we grow wisdom, a quality different from knowledge, through the experiences that the street life of daily living graces us with.

And so, through the repetitive act of raking, it came to me, my answer so soft and yet so certain in it's knowing...my business needed to embrace the same integrity that had served so well my parenting, my crafting of a house into a home, my work as an architect and mediator. Simply, I needed to pay attention to the needs voiced by my business, listen well to the unspoken but clearly said within me, and surrender my impatience to trusting the divine's way. And in surrendering more to receiving and releasing more my need to control, my business could become more than I could have figured out through my knowledge, control, and will alone.

Question asked, answer received....thank you grace!

Making Love with Mystery

The other day, while in chauffermom mode, I listened to NPR's Science Friday being broadcast from the "Origins Symposium" at Arizona State University. Scientists from around the world were discussing "Using Tiny Particles to Answer Giant Questions" and I was struck by what these scientists were saying, scientists whose training focuses them on the logical, rational, and emotionally neutral of their world. They were sharing how they love learning from the unknown mysteries of the universe, the most exciting part of their job being when they went into the mystery and found nothing at all of what they were expecting- "ecstacy" is how one scientist termed it! Not finding out what they expected to find meant they were not thinking big and magically enough and they could now expand their quest (even if it does not make their funding source very happy to not know whether martians truly are green).

As women, we are very familiar with mystery-what man has not exclaimed of this of us-yet we are often challenged to embrace the ecstacy of our mystery in our lives as women. We may revel in the magic and miracle of a body that can turn blood into milk and create from the union of two cells the complexity of a human being. But what to do about the power in our mystery that in times past has made us feared, even thought to be dangerous? Students of history may remember that to be a healer, midwife, or powerful woman in the middle ages could be dangerous, with communities where women were killed simply for using their powers of transformation. Even though generations have come and gone since, patterns of energy carry on through the generations until consciously transformed. Sometimes, the emotions that we feel within us are from a time not our own, and are simply presenting themselves not in the truth of what is so now, but in request of our transforming them for now.

We live in times most exciting, where what we do not know is calling to be embraced by not only scientists as the good news, but by all of us as well. No matter our level of current mastery, we are being asked to embrace even more of who we are, especially the magical mystery of our infinity and divinity. When we embrace our unknown and mystery as the good news, expand through an active relationship with our spirit and soul, and share our experiences with others, we illuminate magic and miracles not yet known. As the scientists pointed out, what we don't know yet may be what saves us from what we know now. Today, consider meeting what you do not know, understand, or have confusion around, as your invitation to greet it instead with awe, curiosity, and excitement, to make love with the mystery of your being and let your ecstacy change the world!